Russians VS Americans Episode One
by GigabyteExcel
Summary: The random times of wars with Frost Leviathan Stratos Cupcake Pony and Naga.


*FROST AND LEVIATHAN*

(Leviathan) Hey Frost

(Frost) Yeah?

(Leviathan) Why are we here?

(Frost) God dammit Lev you ask me that shit every day

(Frost) We're in a war or some shit.

(Leviathan) Ohh...

(Leviathan) Hey Frost

(Frost) GOD DAMMIT LEV IF YOU ASK ME WHY WE'RE IN A WAR I WILL KILL YOU

(Leviathan) Hey Frost

(Frost) No I don't want to see your cat pictures.

(Leviathan) Okay

*Meanwhile RU soldiers*

(Stratos) Hey commander cup *chuckle* pshhh cake HAHAHAHAH

(Cupcake) HEY SHUT THE FUCK UP

(Cupcake) THEY WILL HEAR US

(Cupcake) What are they doing?

(Stratos) Ohh you know same shit they do EVERY DAY

(Stratos) They sit there standing and just talk

(Cupcake) Why don't you snipe them?

(Stratos)Because Pony decided to take the bullets and use them as crayons

*back at base*

(Pony) And this one is a rocket ship

(Pony) pew pew pew pew

(Stratos) So all I fucking have are these sniper rifle 10x lens.

(Cupcake) Ohh

(Cupcake) Well why don't we shoot at them with our rifles?

(Stratos) Are you fucking retarded do you see those huge ass Americans?

*American base Frost and Leviathan*

(Leviathan) Ohh shit Frost

(Leviathan) I think I see the Russians

(Frost) Don't move

(Leviathan) Wait if they have a sniper shouldn't we move?

(Leviathan) I mean like there's a wall like three feet to the left we can probably make it real fast.

(Frost) You know this whole time we've been talking about taking cover we could've did it.

(Leviathan) Then why don't we just move and stop talking.

(Leviathan) Better yet lets counter attack them.

(Frost) Are you fucking crazy?

(Frost) Those Russians are fucking huge and scary as fuck

(Frost) I hear they have an ace sniper too.

*meanwhile the Stratos*

(Stratos) Fuck I have the worst aim ever

(Stratos) I can't even get it to focus on one target

*Frost and Leviathan*

(Leviathan) Shit Frost he's picking which to kill first.

(Frost) Okay here's the plan

(Frost) *push*

(Frost) RUN

(Leviathan)*falls down unconscious*

*Stratos and Cupcake*

(Stratos) I think the Americans just used one of them as a human sacrifice

(Cupcake) Lets go capture him

*Now at RU base*

(Cupcake) We are going to interrogate you for information

(Leviathan) You'll never make me talk

(Cupcake) Pony you know what to do.

(Leviathan) Pony?

(Pony) And HURR DURR THIS ONE IS DA MACARONI ART OF MY PET CAT *looks like a giant penis*

(Pony) AND IT'S ACTUAL SIZE

(Pony) HEY WANT TO CHEW SOME BUBBLE GUM? *uses condom as bubble gum*

(Pony) IT'S DA BANANA FLAVOR *shoves condom in mouth*

(Leviathan) AHHH

(Leviathan) FINE

(Leviathan) I will talk

*Meanwhile at American base*

(Frost) Commander Gigabyte(Commander of American forces) Leviathan has surrendered himself to the Russians.

(Gigabyte) HE WHAT!?

(Gigabyte)OHH THAT PUSSY

(Gigabyte) WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON HIM

(Gigabyte) I AM GOING TO SHOVE MY FIST STRAIGHT DOWN HIS THROAT.

(Frost) Lols

(Frost) You caled him pussy and you're going to shove your hand into him

(Gigabyte) God dammit Frost.

(Gigabyte) Lets go.

(Gigabyte) Get the jeep.

(Frost) Uhh sir we don't have a jeep anymore.

(Gigabyte) Why not god dammit.

(Frost) We used the jeep to try to build a rocket to try to escape last week with Naga remember?

*last week*

(Naga) So I think if you light the gas tank on fire

(Naga) It will shoot this into the air

(Naga) Hey Leviathan get in

(Leviathan) No no no this isn't safe

(Leviathan) NOOOO

(Naga) *lights gas tank*

(Naga) Hmm nothing so fa...BOOM

(Naga) Ohh there we go!

(Naga) OHH LOOK FROST HE WENT LIKE 9 FEET

(Naga) But what's all this red stuff?

(Naga) Okay all we need is 500 more jeeps

(Frost) How are we going to combine them?

(Naga) I have 3 tons of duct tape.

(Frost) Where did you get...

(Naga) Online

(Frost)ONLINE?

(Frost) HOW?

(Naga) Command

(Frost) COMMAND?

(Frost) I CAN'T EVEN GET A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER FROM COMMAND

(Frost) I'VE BEEN USING THIS 200 DOLLAR KEVLAR GLOVES TO WIPE MY SHIT FOR THE LAST 2 MONTHS

(Frost) WHAT ELSE DID YOU GET FROM COMMAND?

(Naga) A unicorn *looks at horse with a horn*

(Frost) ...

(Frost) Fuck you. *back at base*

(Frost) And that's why we don't have a jeep anymore.

Episode one


End file.
